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Game Of Thrones Season 8 “The Bells”
This will be full of ALL THE SPOILERS! Full disclosure: I cursed a lot while watching this episode. I cursed along with characters. I cursed when they didn't but should have on account of what was happening. By the way, I know someone that is deep into reading what other folks have to say about this season and she will tell or show me the stuff. I gotta say...y'all are some toxic motherfuckers. Like, for real. Instead of disagreeing with the way a show is going you choose to say it is the worst thing ever as if there was a way it could've gone and pleased you. They are giving movie length episodes every week for six weeks and ending on a high note unlike most TV shows and yet a lot of you choose to shit on it. Varys is sitting down writing all of the juicy G about the fact that Jon should be running shit and not his potentially/confirmed this episode crazy auntie/girlfriend. A little girl lets him know that she ain't eating or anything. She hasn't even combed her hair since Missandei died.
Varys meets Jon down as he arrives and is pushing for him to take control over Dany. Jon is still being a dick-butt about the whole thing which at this point I still don't understand. Jon understands later though. This episode should have been called “Too Little Too Late.” Jon is in full “She is my queen” mode and when people say that or talk about destiny there is nothing you can do. Tyrion heads to talk to Dany and she is all “Someone betrayed me.” Gulp! She says it is Jon. Tyrion says it is Varys. You snitch! Dany is like “Sansa knew you would tell Varys who will tell others.” Tyrion is like I fucked up but it was just a mistake” and she is like “Don't matter.”
Later that night while Varys is updating his Tumblr the Unsullied come in and he knows the score. He removes his jewelry and burns a note before they even get in the room. He is led down to the beach where Tyrion, soldiers, Jon, and Dany are waiting. Tyrion lets Varys know it was him and says goodbye before Dany has her last dragon set his ass ablaze. Jon is standing there looking all stupid. I was just talking to my best friend the other night about how cool Varys is and how he started from the literal bottom and rose up. Now he dead. Thanks, Tyrion!
Later in the bedroom Dany tells Jon that Sansa is the reason for Varys being dead as much as she is. He don't look so sure about that. She points out that everyone loves him and is just scared of her. Gee, I wonder the fuck why! Jon says he loves her and she is his queen and she tries to get all sexy in the way an auntie could and Jon is not into it. She gives him this look like “Okay. Okay.” Later Tyrion is trying his best to keep Dany from burning King's Landing down and save the people. Tyrion tells her to wait and hear bells which means that Cersei has given up. She tells him the next time he fails her will be the last. She also lets him know they caught Jaime trying to run back to Cersei and have him captured. Tyrion gets a key from Davos and sets Jaime free and they have a really nice moment together and hug as brothers.
The Hound and Arya end up in King's Landing and straight up let a guard know who they are and Arya says she is here to kill Cersei. They end up riding into the city which is being put on lock down. Jaime is also in the city and gets caught in the crowd and locked out. He races to find a secret entrance. Oh, fuck! I forgot! Cersei is watching all of this with that smug ass smirk on her face and not afraid...on the outside. Dany comes in on her dragon and starts wiping out the ships in a far more effective manner than last week. She hits one of the ships that Euron is on. The Golden Company is at the gates in a stand off against Jon and his crew and the dragon burns all their asses. Grey Worm takes out the lead Golden Company guy and they just run through these guys.
Qyburn keeps telling Cersei they need to bounce but she is like “We have arrows to kill the dragon!” and he is like “They gone. The ships gone. We need to be gone!” She says where they are is the safest place to be. The city is scorched to shit. Dany is legit just straight up burning everything. The soldiers look around and end up throwing their swords down. The fight is done. I think. The bells have still not been rung. Know why? Jaime ends up coming across Euron who survived and they end up fighting. He stabs the shit out of Jaime who ends up running a sword through Euron. Euron laughs saying he is the man that killed Jaime Lannister. Bastard.
Jaime ends up ringing the bell and everything should be finished. No more city burning. They win. Dany looks at the capitol where Cersei is and is like “Nah!” and starts burning innocent people. The soldiers that quit start grabbing their swords like “I thought we was good!” and now there are people being set on fire. Soldiers being stabbed. Throats sliced. Its fucking insane. Tyrion is watching all this from outside the gates looking like a damned fool. This is the Dany I have been waiting for. I know her people and her crazy finally came out. Qyburn is finally able to convince her to head to safety.
The Hound and Arya arrive inside and are about to head for Cersei and The Mountain when The Hound tells her that if she comes with him she will die and she does not want to end up like him. She tries to come and he grabs her and forces her to look at him. I was pissed for a second until I realized it was true. He has spent his entire life wanting revenge and it turned him into a monster and he did not want that for her. She can do far more alive than dying today. She thanks The Hound by his name Sandor and leaves. The Hound finds Cersei, Qyburn, the Mountain, and three guards trying to run. The castle is collapsing during everything I am talking about. The Hound greets Cersei and his brother The Mountain. He steps to The Hound and Qyburn is like “Stop I made you protect your queen!” and gets his head smashed into a wall so he dead now. Cersei is like “I'll be going now...” and skitters away.
The Hound and The Mountain go the fuck at it! The start of the fight looks like metal album cover! The Hound is hitting The Mountain and nothing is working. He starts tossing The Hound around like a rag doll. He stabs The Mountain and it does nothing. He puts a sword through his body and it does nothing. Knocks his helmet off. He starts choking The Hound who starts laughing and stabbing him screaming “Wont you fucking die?!” He starts digging his thumbs into The Hounds eyes who screams and then stabs The Mountain in the eye. The Mountain staggers back and I was like “Yay, he won!” Nope. The Hound recovers enough and charges The Mountain. They go crashing through a wall and fall stories below into fire so The Hound is dead now. Fuck. I mean, I knew he couldn't make it out this show alive but I am super happy he was able to finally get his revenge.
Cersei is still on the run and freaking the fuck out when out of the shadows...Jaime! She rushes to his arms and they hug. I was waiting for Arya to stab her and remove a Jaime mask or for Jaime to kill her. Nope. They start looking for the boat Tyrion left for them when they see that the exit is covered in rubble. Cersei says she wants their baby to live and starts panicking saying she does not want to die, not like this. I felt bad for a moment and then remembered all the people she had killed, her rotten ass son Joffrey, how all of this could have been avoided, and that she is pregnant with her brothers kid. I also thought of the fact that Jaime is a dirtbag and the best thing about him was Brienne and he hit it and quit it on her. So fuck these two. The castle ends up crushing them to death and I was happy about it. Would it have been cooler if Arya killed her? Sure. But she killed the motherfucking Night King! She saved the actual world. So deal with it, sad people.
Jon is still in the city watching as Dany burns everything. She is just burning anything in the city. Not saving people. He is not okay with what she is doing and calls for a retreat. He even kills one of his own soldiers who was attacking a woman. Arya is trying to escape and ends up trampled. She is saved by a woman who has a child and who she crossed earlier as the escaped the “”good guys.” The woman and her kid ends up burned alive and Arya just escapes. Arya has been damn near crushed, trampled, and all manner of fucked up. She sees a horse standing there like “Whelp...now what?” She hops on and races out of the city that is totally destroyed. Jon and Tyrion are gonna have a hard time sticking up for Dany after this shit show. And what is Sansa gonna do because Dany is gonna smoke her ass like turkey when she sees her. Fuck, this was intense! My body was not ready for all the deaths.
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